It appears more and more people in the United States are trying to adopt the French style of eating, given recent studies showing very low rate of child obesity in Francecompared to most other developed countries. Two very insightful books have triggered or increased this new found interest for the French take on food and kids’ food education: Bringing up Bébé by Pamela Druckerman, which touches on food but also talks more generally about the French take on child rearing. And French Kids Eat Everything by Karen Le Billon, an insightful and extensive analysis of the way the French approach food and food education for their children (the “éducation du goût", as the French call it, the “education of taste”, the very topic of this blog). Both books were very enlightening for me. As they both rightfully point out, the French aren’t very self-aware about their own practices. I was very much raised in the French tradition of the four-course family meal and have been eating this way since childhood without giving it much thought. Yet the way my mom instilled in me the love and appreciation of good food, the pleasure of cooking and savoring, the love of variety, is one of the things I cherish most about my childhood. Meals were always meaningful bonding times in our household. Dinner parties were festive occasions to connect with friends and share the pleasurable experience that is eating.
Now that I have my own child, instilling that same “foodie spirit” has been a priority for me, and at a very young age. Exposing my son to as many foods (variety, textures, flavors) as possible before age 2 is one crucial component. The other crucial component is the family meal. Even though being a freelancer isn’t always easy, I am very fortunate to be able to work from home, and thus have, most of the time, three sit-down meals with my son every day, with the help of my wonderful mom who looks after Pablo when I work. And especially now that Pablo and we eat the same things, we thus eat as well as Pablo, and are on the same 3 meals plus one afternoon snack a day schedule. I really have seen the benefits of it myself as an adult. I don’t feel hungry throughout the day, very rarely snack, and eat a whole lot more vegetables than I did when I was a young childless adult with “looser” eating habits.
I tried to break it down in a practical way here.
1. SOME PRECONDITIONS
The four-course meal really only works if there isn’t too much snacking during the day. If the kids just snacked an hour before dinnertime or throughout the day, they may not be hungry to eat a full dinner, nor motivated to try new things. The four-course meal “paradigm” only works provided you come to the table hungry. The French don’t get panicky at the thought of their children being hungry. They have an expression that calls hunger a “bonne maladie” (a good illness). There’s nothing wrong with being a bit hungry and have the patience to wait for dinner time. So if you’re trying to establish the French style meal in your household, limiting snacks definitely is a necessary shift to be made as well.
The other precondition for the four-course meal to not turn into a giant hassle, is that everyone eats what is served and on the table. There’s no cooking special dishes for different family members. Everyone has to taste. Of all the things being served, even a picky eater will like at least one thing (if you’re trying to get a child to try new things, I would try one new thing per meal, served with other known things the child enjoys).
It is also important that everyone eat each course together. If someone is finished with the starter before the others, he can wait a few minutes, tell a story, talk about the flavor, smell, texture of the foods, for example.
It is also important that everyone eat each course together. If someone is finished with the starter before the others, he can wait a few minutes, tell a story, talk about the flavor, smell, texture of the foods, for example.
(Karen Le Billon describes in detail the French "food rules" in her book and blog, I highly recommend both as great sources of information and tips on the topic.)
2. THE LOGIC BEHIND IT
I have found that the main concern of most American moms I met was to get their kids to eat more vegetables. It seems to be taken for granted in the US that kids will innately dislike vegetables. Even my pediatrician was somewhat surprised that Pablo ate vegetables of all colors easily and thus didn’t need to take a vitamin supplement. The big advantage of eating this way, is that you get to eat the vegetables first, when you are most hungry.
So after you fill up somewhat on vegetables, you’re more likely to have a smaller or more reasonable portion of the main course.
When you get to the cheese, you’re almost done with dinner, and that small portion of dairy fat helps give you the satiety feeling to hold you over until the next meal.
The simple taste of sweet at the end of the meal seems to be just a reminder that eating is, and should be, a pleasure.
A very important benefit of the four-course meal is that it makes you pace yourself, and eating slowly (and chewing sufficiently) is key to portion control. A French doctor was telling me that when you eat slowly and really chew your food, your stomach shrinks and you need less food to feel full (more scientific information on this here). Plus it takes about 20 minutes for the brain to register that your stomach is full, so this way, you can really listen to your body's cues in terms of the quantity of food you eat. This is why French families end up eating less food in more time than other cultures, as you have to wait a little from one dish to the next. And by the time you get to dessert, you just have room for a taste of sweet, not two huge servings of cake.
The other benefit of the four-course meal is to instill the art of anticipation. So much more positive than “patience”, isn’t it? You’re not “hungry”, you’re “in appetite”. You enjoy the actual process of the meal, rather than try to get it over with as soon as possible. I find that these are important lessons I want to teach my son, not just about food, but about life in general. Learn to enjoy anticipation. Take the time to be aware of your body and what it feels, learn delayed gratification.
3. THE NITTY GRITTY
Here are the specifics of the four-course meal in our household.
The Vegetable Starter
Option #1 - Cooked vegetables eaten cold with vinaigrette
Soup is great. It’s healthy, it’s convenient, it’s comforting. Once a week, we spend a little extra time to put together a vegetable soup (either following a recipe, or a French friend told me he just throws in whatever vegetables he’s got on hand, with onion, herbs, let simmer, mix and there you go…)
We made a lot of variations of gazpachos this summer, always making a batch that would last a couple of days. For hot soups, just reheat, add a touch of cream or yogurt in it, and serve (the French mostly blend their soups). As Karen Le Billon describes in her book, this is a great strategy to get kids to taste new vegetables they might be resistant to try otherwise (a single vegetable soup or puree blended with some potato is perfect for that purpose.)
Some of our favorites are watercress soup, sunchoke velouté, cream of celeriac or broccoli, carrot ginger soup… I am looking forward to experimenting more with hot soups this winter.
The Main Course
Option #1 – The kind that cooks quickly.
Salad & Cheese, the optional third course
The French usually enjoy a plain salad after the main course to help digestion. It’s not a mixed salad with lots of things in it, it is a plain lettuce salad with vinaigrette (I like to add a shallot and some fresh herbs to it). The lettuce can vary from butter lettuce, to delicious lamb’s lettuce (“mâche”, if you have a Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s near you, they sell it), endive, or any other kind of lettuce. We prepare this before the meal, and set it on the table (with the vinaigrette at the bottom, tossing it just before serving) so it’s ready to go. I know it feels strange to have salad after the meal, but you should try it some time, it really helps digestion and is a great palate cleanser.
A small piece of cheese can be served with it or right after it. The fat in the cheese helps trigger the satiety feeling in the brain. Of course, I never knew that growing up, I just knew I really enjoyed concluding my meal with a piece of cheese! (Pablo seems to prefer that to dessert as well).
Dessert
On busy week nights, I rarely “cook” or make a dessert, that is mostly for special occasions. Dessert is most often a yogurt (can be cow, sheep or goat’s milk, regular or Greek Yogurt, often plain with just a sprinkle of sugar, or with fruit), or a piece of fruit. Simplicity is key.
4. PRACTICE RUN!
At 6pm, whoever is cooking starts the Basque chicken. Prep time is about 15 minutes. Cooking time about 50mn to 1 hr. By 6:20pm, the chicken is under way in the Dutch oven… and we can deal with bath time, picking up toys, etc.
At 6:45pm, we start getting dinner ready. I open the fridge to see what vegetables we have. We cooked a cauliflower and some green beans yesterday. I toss together some cauliflower, green beans and cherry tomatoes, drizzle some vinaigrette. I grab some marinated olives too.
I take a whiff of the chicken, because after all, life's all about smelling
I grab a bag of mâche (lamb’s lettuce), give it a quick wash. I pour some vinaigrette in the bottom of a bowl, throw the lettuce in, add salad servers and put it on the dining room table. (If I have an extra 5 minutes, I cut up a shallot and add some parsley, or chives, or basil, or all three.)
Now I set the table: I put everything we’re going to need, so I have to get up as little as possible during the meal. Besides the obvious plates and silverware and napkins (I often put a small plate for the appetizer and a larger plate for the main course, but that’s extra dishes and not an obligation), a jug of water (we only drink water at dinner, no juices or sodas), whatever serving spoons we may need, salt and pepper, butter, bread (only eaten as accompaniment to soak up some vinaigrette or with cheese, and in reasonable quantity, definitely not as an appetizer!) We keep a few different kinds of cheese in a Tupperware, I put it on the table too (on an inspired night, I might present them nicely on a plate or platter). The cauliflower green beans salad I've just prepared, and the olives (as the fun sidekick starter!)
It’s 7pm, time for dinner. The chicken is done, we set the hot Dutch oven on a table mat on the table. And we sit down.
We enjoy our cold vegetable salad, Pablo loves asking for more olives. Then we put the smaller plates aside, and serve the chicken Basquaise. Everyone soaks up the juices in their plate with a bit of bread.
We toss the salad, and whoever wants some can have some. I always try to give a few leaves to Pablo, he seems to really enjoy the tangy vinaigrette and chews on the leaves forever. That is, until the cheese is offered… for Frenchie Pablo does love his cheese! Everyone picks which cheese they want to try tonight.
Then, (and technically, that is the first time of the meal I have to get up from the table), everyone chooses what they want for dessert (if they want one.) I bring a couple pieces of fruit, and some plain yogurt sprinkled with a bit of sugar. No choice is give on the main course, so it’s nice to have that little flexibility for dessert.
Dinner usually takes about 45 minutes. Meal summary: about 10 different kinds of vegetables, some dairy, some protein, some starch/grain (bread in this case). And a happy family with full tummies!
The important is to look at it as a moment of connection, relaxation, enjoyment, conversation and laughs.
5. GETTING ORGANIZED
So... there you have it. Are you tempted to give it a try, or still skeptical? Share your thoughts in the comments!
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